Friday, January 14, 2011

Hey aaye aaye!

J&K Government invites applications from Kashmiri domiciles for the appointment of constables in J&K Police Department

Age limit:- 18+

Reservation:-
                        SC (scheduled caste) -  10%
                        ST  (scheduled tribe) - 10%
                        SP  (Stone Pelters)     - 60%
         Children of Ex Sangbaaz Men -  20%


Experience Required:-
#  Candidate should have a minimum 3 years of indepth field knowledge in stone pelting.

#  Candidate should be able to demonstrate the Salsa techniques and body movements in accordance with the rythms of Ragda Ragda!

#  Candidate should match a voice frequency of 14000Hz or more while shouting a high pitch slogan like "Hey Aaye Aaye Aazadi"

#  Candidate must be fluent in both kashmiri as well as urdu sloganeering with high expertise in "Military wala doodh mai daala phirbi sala kaala hai" &  Jagg borukh baatay goule aayas Ly***"


Remuneration:-
     30% onspot appraisal plus"Khinz".
     *Onspot apprisals are only provided to the candidates from SP catagory based on their previous income earned as a stone pelter.

Note:- Unsucessful candidates are encouraged to actively participate in coming summer stone pelting session named - "Khoon ka badla june mai lengay" .It is a 6 months crash course designed to understand and learn how to handle the critical situations in a gurella warfare.

2 comments:

Unknown said...

Good comment !
But those who are in secretrait these days were stone pelters in shiekh Abdul's Time.

Cycleji said...

@Idc: So that means i should not get surprised if they get a reservation in future politics so that we are completely taken over by these ignorant dictators.